Is this injustice to women or they are not capable ? a Facebook status asked this question. This was in regard to women winning just 10 seats in constitutional assembly’s election that was held in November 19, 2013.
My reaction to this was different. As for me equal gender issue is not political or judicial issue, therefore we should not seek its answer in politics. I don't see women being invited in any talk shows for open debate ? Is that political issue ? This is the reality of our society which indicates the mentality of our society as a whole. No wonder if we can see almost all aspect of our life in form of lack of presence of women in power positions. Therefore, I think this is not the injustice to women nor we are incapable than men.
I disagree with those who try to mix the gender equality rights with issue like equal treatment as a human being, such as color, caste, creed, disabled, and other minorities. Talk of gender equality has nothing to do with equal right issue as human being. We must be very clear on this issues first, before we sit on the table for open and hot discussion for gender equality.
“Male and female should have an equal participation on constitution forming body. There are some delicate issues - males can't understand about women and women can't understand about men....” Anand Nepal respond to my post on own status. I totally agree with his reasoning as that is not even the matter of disagreement. I am only saying this is not political issue.
Even though it may sound same to some, talk of gender equality and equal rights issue are not the same. Because both gender has color, caste, creed, disabled, many other minorities issues to sort out in-between, around the world; which makes it a whole lot of different issue in so many ways.
However, every time I read a piece of article on women's right or a talk show on Nepali TV, I get a view that first there are men and then there are women, disables, minorities and indigenous right. Its not men who keep rattling this like parrot without even giving it much thought, that they are their on the national media to give voice to those who are confused about this subject but, what is even more frustrating is, its the women's right activists who are invited on TV do not know the difference between these core thoughts, which sounds almost the same to them. Women rights activist who came on TV seem to be saying this ‘women, disabled, minorities and indigenous’ when they are talking about the women's right issue. If we have people with confused understanding on such topic on the TV screens or on the pages of national dailies, who do not have clarity in thinking about the subject matter they are talking about then; who will give the clarity in thinking to the confused mass on this very controversial subject ?
When equal rights vocalist like me, challenge the norms men carry, “we are superior sex” attitude they think this is the sign of sickness. In my recent facebook status when I posted : I am not complaining if the literacy rate in Nepal is 51.4% women against 72.2% literate men. What I complain is that we can't even see 5% of women's presence in media, when they try to find some solutions that persist in our day to day life. As if men of my society have all the answers. This gender brassiness is not political issue, this is mentality of men of our society.
I can say without hesitation that men in media are afraid to invite brilliant and intelligent women in open discussions on national television channels. They think it's beneath their dignity, if women are smarter than them when the the whole country finds logic in a question they raise. That's why tour media maintains a thundering silence on gender equality issue. Some shamelessly blame politicians for this saying this is political issue.
I got a very sharp comments on this, saying this is just a ranting from a woman and nothing more than empty vessel making noises. The comment was posted by Aavas Karma a staff of Indian Embassy, who works in literary and cultural section. His comment is just another indication of how educated men in our society think and then react about gender equality issue. When he got sharper opinion from me he wished me “get well soon”. Then I replied him, “This is what is more sickening than anything, when men think we are sick when we talk about equal right issue.”
Next day he deleted all his comments as well as delisted me from his friends circle.
As a woman who is a hardcore feminist with sharp mind, I will not feel comfortable to say that we are superior sex. Even as an equal right vocalist, I say we are equal gender and there should not be sexual biases in this discussion. Men should not have any reservation accepting this and if any we still get struck on this reservation then we are not even focusing on equal gender right. The talk will then derail from down the path.
If I say I am superior than the other sex, it only displays my own inferiority in front of the other sex and the own who is claiming it covering that insecurities and inferiority in different facade; instead of simplifying it. No doubt, there will be more discussion rather that focusing on the real point, which is gender equality.
Average men suffer from low self confidence and their insecurities soar high when they have to give credit to women for what they deserve for they being deserving candidates. Some believe man's ego is their real ID, but; we need to separate the ego of man and gender equality issue. This topic should not clash with talk of ego, because this is not who is better or who is smarter. This is our ability to accept both sex importance in our society which we can’t deny in any way and must get equal right in all aspect of life, rather than one trying to get bigger pie from it.
Some men reason that, “Women empowerment - should come from within.” and I totally agree with this thinking. But first our society which is very much inspired by religious books have brainwashed girls/woman in such a way that they have lost all the confidence to lead life independently or even face the brute men. However, I am forced to think at times when I see those women; must we act like customized computer and not get our own thinking on this matter ? When are we going to take needed step to tell men that we are different in so many ways yet equal gender, none of us are better or smarter than another sex.
Men and women are a whole lot of different in terms of physical structure as well as they are differently wired in their brain also. Men are more stronger physically and women are better at multitasking but this does make one superior or other inferior. Both comes with different sets of pros and cons. Different way of thinking does not make one superior and another inferior, its just the different opinion. Then the question is why men think they are superior than women ? Why men take it too personally and keep telling women are weaker sex ? Physical strength has nothing to do with mental strength and who needs in today time to carry loads on their shoulder to win the prize for being a superior sex ?
Why men keep trying to seek their own identity in being mere security blanket for women or the free ticket to meal ? Talk of gender equality do not challenge this norms. Is being financial provider and protector puts them in superior position ? Does this gives them right to make rule for women in their life and suddenly it becomes societal rule bar like 'Laxman Rekha' ? What I don't understand is, talking about gender equality do not intend to ignore their importance in our life. We just need to find more harmony in this society for better life and for that we have to find our importance even if we have to face some people who carry stone age mentality who keep denying the open debate on this matter.
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